Leave the heart on the shore I'll pick it up later

What defines a relationship? Is it the ties between two people, the shared emotions, the convenience, the lust of the other, the friendship, the spiralling nausea, the butterflies that grow and build up to become a storm, the need for another? It's hard to say really, I think most of the time relationships are defined by others, by the fact that people keep asking you about the other person. Where is .... How is .... When will .... you fuck off and leave me alone in my own pool of smelly newly found puppylove - let me find out myself who and what, let me decide if I want to live in the cloud of baby pink until I realise it won't work, don't push me into the abyss on my own by your stupid questions. Let me find out how I feel before you decide for me, before you give me the role of partner, of other half. What happens if I don't want to leave the pre-relationship stage, what if I want to stay here forever, never develop real love, never develop dependency, never feel vulnerable. Let me swim in the pool of uncertainty because the rejection or commitment is too great for me, the weak nature of my behaviour will never forgive me if I give in to you - to your pressures to confirm. To become once again a part of something, again put my heart out to be stamped on by a big fluorescent sign stating 'out of order'. Let my twisted evils be tamed within my chest and not unleashed on some poor soul, who you, yes YOU, deemed to his death by being 'in a relationship', tortured by a broken mind.
Just killed a sailor with my cigarette.

Companionship versus Relationship?

Yesterday itelli and I were sitting in the window seat of one of our many local bars/coffee shops watching people go in and out, couples old and young, when we started talking about relationships. Under which circumstances the question arose: companionship or relationship, what's the difference? And what do we prefer? I don't know if we came to any conclusions on the subject, but here's a recap of a few of the arguments:

Companionship means a coming together of friends, two friends set out to share a flat, a home, a life, but continue to live separate lives, continue to keep their freedom, a commitment based on trust and openness, both individuals respect each other and do not try to change the other person in any way or form. As itelli put it, a relationship were you don't become one entity. I don't know if I agree or even comprehend what this means, but bear with me..

Relationship is two people in love, joining each other's lives and becoming one, as my ex would say, a 'You and me against the world' sort of thing. The partners respect each other, but realise one will change to accommodate the other half of the relationship, however, there are rules/restraints. The two expect things of each other, when are you coming home tonight, dinner will be at 18, jealousy develops, it becomes more ownership than a pact, a common future develops, and will eventually in most cases either end in marriage or a breakup.

This is where it gets tricky, shouldn't they be one and the same thing - shouldn't they intertwine, find a balancing line? One where one has freedom and respect, yet still change and develop with the other person? Become one together? I guess one of the points here are that companionships don't end as quickly and dramatically as relationships do, the basis is friendship and the love develops out of respect rather than a hot quick flame of passion, which could extinguish as quickly as it appeared.

What do you think?

Love is a tricky thing really, it can make you so happy you feel you can do anything, and it can bring you down to a level where you cannot do anything at all.