14/07/2009

Update from CPH

I'm restless(and hungry) but I've finished some work and that makes me proud. Not a lot, but enough to feel proud, to feel like I've done something. Now I just have to choose what to send to the idolised lecturer, the one I have an intellectual crush on. That is a little more tricky than writing or plain reading. We don't want him to think I'm a total dumbass. A total waste of Academic space...no? Well my confidence isn't high at the moment, but I will try to not worry about what he will think of my unfinished thesis chapter. The uncritical version. Well I guess one day (and hopefully sooner rather than later) two 'proper' academics and high on the scale of intellectual ambivalence will read it and make their judgement, so 'wipe-me-off-my-feet-with-your-giant-knowledge' lecturer isn't that big a deal, or so I keep telling myself. So I smoke another cigarette and contemplate the wrongness in those words. I've been smoking too much here, it must be my chain-smoking sister's bad influence (more likely the fact that I am sitting in a space where I can smoke all the bloody time - the living room). I am also currently on a diet of wine and water, just to keep the spirits high and the body ok at the same time. Forgot (well didn't have the room in my rucksack) my gym equipment so can't do anything to keep the body fit, so I've decided to try to eat less and smoke more. Good choice, no? Sex would help, but since I've not really hit the single bars yet (as if they exist in this land of the beautiful people) that seems kinda out of my reach. Although it would suit my purpose to find some random Danish viking to satisfy my immediate needs as the village has less than can be desired. Basically nothing on offer during the summer months over there, so glad I left (although just for a wee while)! Booked my trip to Scandoland's second capital today. Can't believe it is cheaper to fly than it is to go by train! But yeah ,so I am flying there in August and staying in a double bed studio close, I hope, to the center of town. I wish I had someone to share it with though, as the plan was to share with sister and have a Swedish adventure together, but she has to work. Alas I am alone in that capital once again! Unless I can find some hunk to keep me occupied during the nights - I am going to be the lonely academic stuck in a Studio all by herself. Enough complaining, enough writing.

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