another day passes by at extreme speed

Someone is vacuuming above my head...Oh they stopped!
The time in Scotland is moving ever closer to the end, tomorrow I will hopefully see the one person I actually came to see the main MAN, the boss of my academic life, the guide in this mess of a thesis... I've managed while here to actually pick up four books at the library - will they be read before I leave again? Probably not, but a quick glance at them will let me know if I need to read them at a later point...ok not too clever, but at least I am trying to gather some sort of knowledge - isn't that what this academic life is all about?
Yesterday I got an immense ego-boost, talking to a friend of mine who's the editor of the journal which will come out at the end of June with my very first published article...She told me that my article was great and easy for her compared to the others - wooohooo Then she continued to tell me that her supervisor has only good things to say about me, why was it again that I chose mine? Maybe I should start thinking about more articles and maybe turning out a book, or maybe I should just focus on the task at hand? Probably the best idea, so let's!

I told u so

I'm back in Scotland again and what a shock - the temperatures are freezing and the sun is too shy to look at the Scots pale bodies to even peek out from behind the clouds. Also everything has changed here...its only been half a year, but it's changed. New structures, new stores, new people... I guess I can't expect it to stay the same forever, but hey this is just too much for me to take in. This little village on the cliff is usually so beautiful and peaceful, but without the weather to brighten it up it feels like autumn, except for the golfers and the lack of students... I hear that Norway has summer while I'm away - oh how I wish I was a Goddess right now. I would just redirect the sun in my direction and make it warm up my shivering body. Although its cold I have good friends to warm my heart, and how I've missed them. They are all so welcoming and happy to see me, why did I ever move? Oslo is good, but all of the friends I had before I spent these six years in the UK have all disappeared - well I guess there are a couple who will always be there, to be fair they have to be mentioned. However way I look at it though my friends here (Scotland) are the best! They always make me feel special and welcome and they are not as timid as many Scandos are - I miss them a lot. It is hard to move to a different country all by yourself, but as I have found out even more difficult to move back to a country which was your home for twenty years to find you feel lonely without the people you left behind. I am stuck in my flat (of choice) working most of the days and since I don't have a university/school/job to go to I meet no one but the people I meet through my best friend. Nothing wrong with them and nothing wrong with her - we are just different people...if that makes sense without hurting anyone's feelings? I need intelligent conversation about the news, the world, art...So I miss being here, miss having people around me that appreciate me for who I am and not the clothes I wear. Norway is sooooo superficial, fashion means too much - either you follow the latest trends meticulously or you don't, and if so you have to have a clearly defined one for it to 'work'...Maybe I'm the one who's superficial - I just don't feel at home in my own city anymore! I think I might have made a mistake moving back...hssss don't tell my parents! When on that subject, my father seems to be very happy I've moved back. I did miss my parents a lot, but I guess I didn't actually miss the country that much...I mean it's great compared to a lot of other places, but the people can sometimes be too posh, stuck up, timid, full of fear of what they don't know...and what bugs me the most hung up on skiing!
I just wanted to say that I am glad people are different all over the world, and I am glad I have so many good friends that I know I can always count on. I am glad I am here so that I can see you all and feel encouraged and appreciated and snuggling warm inside in your company. I miss you guys - I really do!

Comment on the fact that we get older everyday

Itelli got me thinking...What is it like to get old? I mean we get older everyday, but we don't really feel it. One morning I woke up (accidentally the morning of my 25th birthday) and felt no older than the day before, but I felt like I'd become an adult. Maybe I should have felt that way beforehand, at 18 or 20, but I didn't. The life as a student can do that to you I guess, being older than everyone else, but still feeling their age. However, on that morning I suddenly felt different like I was supposed to have a family of my own and a house and all that. It has been freaking me out ever since and it's been a couple of years. I've always wondered if one actually feels old when old - I mean except for the aches and pains, which naturally comes with age, do my parents feel like their age? Do I feel like my age? I don't know! I feel older everyday because of the fact that I am supposed to be accomplished by now, have a flat, a family perhaps and most recently a job. There has always, at least for me, been a fear-factor related to the issue of growing old. Why does it have to be this way? It doesn't help of course when the prospect of getting older, a pensioner, means instability, especially when living in a capitalist world. Because of the decrease in population in Western Europe we will most likely have less when we decide to stop working, and today the lowest social benefits for pensioners in Norway is appalling - especially when compared to the average wage. Because of the high cost of almost any commodity (let's leave salmon out of this) many elderly are having a hard time coping with the price the most basic necessities, such as rent and food. When our little Greek friend was here we saw an 80-90 year old woman looking for bottles in a council bin...IN NORWAY! I feel more afraid than ever about getting old, if society don't change that will be me. Since the government wants to implement a new pension system, which in fact means that all you earn will be counted towards your pension, and the more you work the more you get. However, this means that a researcher like myself, who has spent six/seven years studying will be behind those years...so I will have to work until I'm over 80. I just don't get it, we are encouraged to get a degree, but we are then expected to work for longer...and end up with a tiny pension that is complimented (hopefully and in best case scenario) with a private one. Is this the way it should be in a so-called social democracy? I hope not, but I fear it is. If a socialist country can't do anything about this, which can?